Joy Irish

Staying in a marriage for a long time may not be easy for some women. When it comes to marriage, every woman (or man) is different, and every marriage, i.e. the coming together of two unique individuals, is never the same.

Having married the husband of your choice, you must have noticed something especially good -for you- about him, and thus ought to stay happy in the marriage. Remember that marriage is not just getting a certificate, but tying knots with someone you wish to spend the rest of your life with.

The man you live with may not be the best of ALL TIME choices you would have wanted to make, but he was the best AT THE TIME, and as a woman, you  need to remember that humans only have a finite time, and so should always make the best of your marriage -AS IS.

Below are few tips to help women stay in their marriage happily

Be grateful:

Being able to vocalize your appreciation is a good thing for a relationship. You should be able to tell your man words like ‘Thank you’ or ‘I like that’. This will show your man that you appreciate whatever they are doing or giving. This makes your man feel that there is a connection and not an obligation to spend on certain things. This is, of course, irrespective of the amount they spend on the gifts.

Do not try to change your spouse:

No matter what strange or different beliefs your husband may be having, try not to change them immediately. This is probably a way of survival for early marriages. You may want to explore family patterns of your husband. He may be raised in certain families with certain manners and patterns of behavior, and as such, you have an inner circle insight about him. This means that he has a certain way of handling or reacting to certain things.

Try to understand your husband and try blending in.

Own your actions:

You should always learn to take responsibility for your actions. This may be good or bad deeds. This way, you will always learn when to agree or disagree. In as much as women would want to be listened to, it’s not a bad idea if you let your man have his opinion too. Try not being a winner in every argument. This way, you will learn to say sorry when it is appropriate. There are no winners in bitter spousal arguments. Disagreements from arguments should only be seen as possible fall backs to the adopted option. Couples are that -COUPLES.

Improve on your friendship:

Find out what your man loves doing and be part of it. This will help your man to also want to be a part of what you enjoy. This way, you will find that you enjoy each others’ company most of the time. Nevertheless, you can revive on those little things that used to make both of you happy before marriage. It is common for a spouse to forget or assume such things given the busy schedules. However, you can always stir these moments.

Show respect:

Be able to have and show respect to your man. As much being polite may seem old fashioned and submissiveness in a way, it works. If you show respect then your man will respect you back. Try not to embarrass your man in front of his friends or family. Save the moment for your alone time like bed time. It is healthy to have secrets and sometimes share with family or friends. However, this should not be a way of exposing your marriage.

Lastly, it is important that you don’t jump into conclusion that your marriage is not working. Before you try marriage counseling, you might want to try out the tips above.

Be ready to share with your husband what you feel might be the problem. You can also involve family members or friends. Remember, a problem shared is half solved.

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